I’m almost pissed that her name is Lauren. It’s just too simple and does no justice. She should be a “Raven” or “Whorebox.” I gotta say I had a really hard time deciding which pictures to post of her. Her myspace profile is chalk full of fun, drunkenness and lewd behavior. Seriously man, this girl has it all. Well all except for the “reasonably well adjusted functioning in society” part.

Unfortunately this was literally the only picture that was somewhat isolated and you get kind of a clear look at her. Obviously it brings nothing to the table in terms of getting to see her face but I think you get the picture. Wait do you? Oh yeah, I have to spell it out right? LOOK AT HER BREASTS.

First off, I don’t care whether she was actually playing beirut at the time or just wanted to take the picture. Nothing turns me on more than rampant drunken beer games with girls that are better than average. She also has beer stains towards the bottom of the foot if you’re actually looking past her chest. I wonder what the guy to the left is gonna do with that yellow ball he’s palming…

Couple of thoughts here. Girl on the left. Definitely gets cock on her own but is without question Lauren’s “losery” bitch. It’s fine tough. Secondly, this guy’s name HAS to be Rocco or something like that. He might actually jerk off more than any male in America.

Who, seriously who the fuck posts pictures like this in their myspace profile? Look, I truly believe this girl is that fucked up. I don’t think this profile is fake by any means. Every picture in there is homemade. I’m just baffled. I truly am. I’m also a wee bit turned on and longing for college at this very moment.

Everyone needs a picture like this up on their wall.

Have a great holiday weekend folks. See you all on Tuesday. Please, for the love of Christ, go out get drunk, have lots of gross sex and report back to me.

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