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Jul 23 2008

It Would Be a Travesty if Lauren Didn’t Become Famous

Published by Brock Landers at 3:15 am under Famous Lauren

You’ve got all these annoying actresses out there who are famous and yet not even that hot. Let’s use Mischa Barton as the perfect example here. She’s NOT hot. Can we please agree on this? She just has that valley girl, rich, privileged way about her that seems to work on television.

This girl Lauren? I wouldn’t know her from a crack in her own amazing ass. But I can tell you this. If she has half a skill in either singing or acting, she’s got the perfect look to be a new Jessica Simpson or Miley Cyrus type of chick.

Lauren’s got that fresh out of high school, pure, “I hope she gets completely trashed her freshmen year of college but doesn’t gain any weight” type of look. And she also has the “I’d really like to go down on her type of look.” I gotta be honest. In my eyes only like 1-2% of the female population elicit that look in me.

So Lauren, take it as an honor that I’d give you the treatment for at least a week and probably would only come up for air to watch “The Hills” or “The OC.”

P.S. That she put her Myspace address across every picture but one is pretty damned annoying.

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