I just want to congratulate Emma on winning the title of Miss Great Britain in 2004 because if it weren’t for her Myspace Profile I never would have known that fact. And if it weren’t for her blatantly squeezing her tits together I also never would have known how appealing breast feeding might be as an adult.

And you know something else? Emma isn’t really that hot. I mean yes, she has the kind of body that most of us males covet. But you know what I like about her? She has that vibe that if you had one or two drinks in her and asked her to do anal, I think she’d do it.

I really do. Chicks that pose in pictures with other chicks in erotic positions have to be willing to do anal. I think that’s a rule. Not to mention Emma’s posed topless. If you’re willing to be topless in front of the world you might has well take it up the butt in private right?

Emma, let’s get that drink together and see if my theory stands true. Plus I’d love it if Emma used the word “bum” instead of ass. It’d make the experience that much more enjoyable.

Tough to mistake Michelle Hunziker for anyone else.

Hello my little seedlings. I trust everyone had a pleasant weekend. Hopefully you were all doing something fun as less of you were reading this site. Shame on you. Shame on you for actually getting ass instead of looking at it.

The Twenty

Michelle Hunziker and her white bikini - [Doubleviking]

Human Tetris played with Italian Supermodels wearing very little - [Unibrow]

The World’s Fastest Guitar Player - [Cameltap]

Chasey Lain just isn’t the same pornstar she used to be - [Drunkenstepfather]

White Trash Mets fans get into fight - [Busted Coverage]

Lisa Kaye loves to slut it up go go style - [Dirty Rotten]

It’s time to try and guess these breasts - [On205th]

Showdown: SI Models vs. Victoria’s Secret Models - [COED Magazine]

Are Nereida Gallardo’s fake boobs too big? - [NS4W] (links to NSFW)

The Stepbrother’s phone prank - [Tastybooze]

Mallika Sherawat does a Bollywood good - [Holy Taco]

Just some really hot Bond girls dancing in very little - [Flabber]

The Sexy ladies of Danity Kane and their new video - [Celebridiot]

Nicky Whelan couldn’t have a better body if she tried - [My Chill Pill]

A pretty scary minor league brawl - [Macgsworld]

Why WVU would win the ACC - [Losers with Socks]

Jaslene Gonzalez loves to wear little t-shirts - [Bright Black Internet]

Getting in on the Brooke Hogan bikini train - [Blog of Hilarity]

Marissa Miller parties at the pool in New Jersey - [Banned in Hollywood]

The second greatest 4 second video ever - [Nextround]

There’s just something sexy about a woman in her thirties who has a ridiculous body, is a lawyer, and decides to model in revealing lingerie in her spare time. Jacquelyn Soprano here is a copyright and trademark lawyer. I’m curious if she’ll ask me to take these pictures down.

But let’s get into it here. She’s in her 30’s. Check. I dig the older stuff. Is she all that pretty? She’s got a nice face but not necessarily the tops in the world. But let me tell you something. She’s got me. She’s got me completely seduced already. Why? I’ll tell you why.

Business suits. Jacquelyn is definitely the type that crosses her legs when she’s dotting her T’s and I’s in a cab. And when that leg crosses and the slit in that skirt reveals the amazing legs she already has, I’m done for. That independent, sexy, in control look is more sexy than any dumbass hot girl dancing on a pole.

Jacquelyn, you could represent me anytime honey. I’d really like to go over some depositions and filings with you. Could we set up a time to meet in your chamber? I’m gonna need you to straighten out my esquire.

Perfect timing for Gulbis to stretch out her breasts.

Ladies and Gentlemen. It’s Friday. And you know what that means. It means nothing to me because I work from home and I’ll be working even more tomorrow. Working hard to find you tail that you may not have seen. So have fun partying and please send me a hooker, thanks.

The Twenty

Natalie Gulbis definitely stretches like that on purpose - [Busted Coverage]

This is Genius: The Ladies of Craigslist Casual Encounters - [COED Magazine]

Rachel Bilson’s tush in jeans - [Drunkenstepfather]

Emanuelle Chriqui dressed as a sexy maid - [Cameltap]

Who’s Hotter? Shannon Elizabeth or the Naked Spoof Chick? - [Doubleviking]

Brittany Gastineau’s got some cleavage - [Dirty Rotten]

A One Dollar Allowance for the Obama kids - [Holy Taco]

This is great: Rap Battle gone wrong - [Tastybooze]

Keeley Hazell, now on desktops worldwide - [On205th]

I don’t think you need to airbrush Kim Kardashian - [Celebridiot]

Here’s an interesting method of doing the wave - [Don Chavez]

Anytime a bunch of Asians are in a big pile it’s funny - [Flabber]

This is what happens when cheaters attack - [Losers with Socks]

The Best Summer League Player ever - [Macgsworld]

Here’s why women will be second to men - [Bright Black Internet]

Jesus Christ Jackie Degg is ridiculous - [Nextround]

The Slutty Supergirl is a great ComicCon accessory - [Asylum]

30 Greatest Moments in Found Porn History - [Banned in Hollywood]

Three Words: Brooke Hogan Playboy - [Derober]

More of the Hottest USC Song Girl - [All Balls]

I do buy into the fact that she’s incredibly gorgeous. I tried listening to her music on her Myspace Profile and after 30 seconds I felt like I was getting my period. It was just a little too college crybaby stuff.

Hey, I’m not trying to take anything away from Tracy. I first felt I’d be really bored writing this article simply because Tracy gives off the sweet girl vibe, and that’s just generally boring. But having seen she appeared on Howard Stern and posed in bikinis, I’m finding some new respect for her wild side.

And let’s not forget an appearance on Rachel Ray. You guys think Rachel Ray is hot? I gotta say I’m a fan. It’s my personal belief that Rachel Ray gets very down and dirty in the bedroom. I just feel that about her.

So anyway, Tracy, if you could come over some time and serenade me I’d really appreciate it. And you know something else babe? You have amazing breasts. Stop hiding them so much. Thanks a bunch doll.