You guys know how I feel about DJ’s. She was a playmate in 2004 though? Where the hell was I in 2004? Well it’s a good thing I came across her Myspace Profile otherwise I wouldn’t forgive myself had it gone another 3 years before seeing her. You know why I like DJ’s so much? Call me sexist but I just can’t stand watching women’s sports. Maybe women’s tennis. I like that. But overall the quality of play just isn’t as good. It’s nothing against the women but why watch a woman score by a layup when I can watch a Kobe Bryant slam dunk over Yao Ming? These are plays women will NEVER make in basketball. Why watch a woman hit a 300 ft home run when I can watch a steroid pumped man hit a 500 ft blast? Point is, in the DJ world some of these women rival men with their skills, and they’re hot to boot. I respect that and want to fuck Colleen really badly.

I’m gonna go on record and say that her face does need improvement. It’s a little too European masculine. Her teeth are alway showing. That said her nudy pictures are quite lovely and I’d have zero problem letting her twist my nipples similarly to how she spins those records. Did I mention how amazing that outfit is? See, I’ll bet she’s the type that actually goes to work that way. I’d have a tough time listening to the dance music if I knew she was on the turn tables wearing that stuff.

OK I get it with the teeth. Stop it with the teeth! I wonder what songs are playing at that very moment. I hope it’s something like “Heart of Glass” by Blondie. Colleen currently lists her income at over 250K a year. That basically means I’d marry her at the drop of a hat.

Very Hot Picture. There’s something quite sexy about wearing one of those playboy symbol necklaces. Well, it’s sexy on her because she was actually IN Playboy. There’s nothing quite as gross as when some girl who’s not even attractive wears anything like that. Rather when unattractive girls wear stuff like cowboy hats and shirts that say stupid stuff like “Sexy” or “Cutie Girl” or “I’m a Slut,” it’s a real turn off. Anyway, Colleen has my permission to wear all of these things because on her they actually are sexy, cute and slutty.

Why not save the best for last? Yeah I’ll leave you all with that.

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