I just want to congratulate Emma on winning the title of Miss Great Britain in 2004 because if it weren’t for her Myspace Profile I never would have known that fact. And if it weren’t for her blatantly squeezing her tits together I also never would have known how appealing breast feeding might be as an adult.

And you know something else? Emma isn’t really that hot. I mean yes, she has the kind of body that most of us males covet. But you know what I like about her? She has that vibe that if you had one or two drinks in her and asked her to do anal, I think she’d do it.

I really do. Chicks that pose in pictures with other chicks in erotic positions have to be willing to do anal. I think that’s a rule. Not to mention Emma’s posed topless. If you’re willing to be topless in front of the world you might has well take it up the butt in private right?

Emma, let’s get that drink together and see if my theory stands true. Plus I’d love it if Emma used the word “bum” instead of ass. It’d make the experience that much more enjoyable.