If you’ve been a reader of the site for any period of time then you probably know that there are some girls I post who I think are nailable. These are the party girls that with the right amount of booze and self-pity, will sometimes slip and stoop to screwing a (physically) much less attractive counterpart. It happens all the time and average shmucks who have the odd “on” night are most thankful for this strange yet understandable phenomenon. Then there are girls like Hayley.

Girls like Hayley are special. They don’t have regular vaginas, but rather magical playgrounds with non-stop harp music and swarms of butterflies. These vaginas keep a long time and are always the perfect level of moist. Like a Twinkie.

What’s really amazing is that 21 year young Hayley is single (so says her Myspace). As you know, ridiculously cute and presumably sane girls are NEVER fucking single. That’s why I’m going to watch There’s Something about Mary five times today and evaluate my chances of moving to California and somehow crizzling my way into this girl’s life.

Damn in every picture she just steals the show. No contest, and those are not bad looking ladies. Hey what are you doing this weekend? I’m thinking maybe I’ll be the one with the retarded brother…

The rest of the Hayley Gallery