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Archive for the 'Jessica Burciaga' Category

Feb 13 2010

Jessica Burciaga – Valentine’s Day Poem

Published by Charlie Harper under Jessica Burciaga

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I noticed we haven’t posted any pics lately of HGOM Favorite Jessica Burciaga. So here are some pics..along with a lil’ ditti poem..

Jessica Burciaga, you make us silly;
You make our hearts beat willy-nilly;
When we’re with you, the world is hazy;
Jessica Burciaga, you drive us crazy!
Jessica Burciaga, when we’re apart,
Our need for you goes off the chart.
Will you be mine? Can I be thine?
Say you’ll be my Valentine!

  • Here’s Jessica’s Myspace page.

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4 responses so far

May 04 2009

How to Sleep With Jessica Burciaga

Published by Brock Landers under Jessica Burciaga

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That’s right guys, the nuggets of wisdom contained in this post could very well bag you Jessica Burciaga. It started when I was looking over an old post of Jessica (site maintenance) and a reader’s comment caught  my eye. Actually, shit spewing supercilious narrative is a more apt description. This is what HGOM reader “Steven” had to say:

Whoever wrote this article needs to realize (for his own good) that he’s made himself out to be completely unattractive based on the way he wrote.

It’s one thing to appreciate beauty, it’s another to obsess and fantasize it like a 13 year old boy.

To the author and the rest of you hopefuls: you CAN get laid, and you can get girls this hot or hotter, but you have to ditch the 13 year old boy attitude.

Girls won’t go for guys that do the following:

1) Put them up on a pedestal
&
2) Act like little boys.

They will go for a real MAN, though, one who is confident and mature.

Part of being a man is growing up enough to have the maturity and confidence to not say the things I see posted here. I hate to be condescending, but like I said, it’s for all of your own good to wake up and smell the coffee.

Do yourselves a favor, ditch the “hot girls are untouchable” attitude and start treating them how they should be treated–like any other person in your life. Once you do that, you’ll realize how easy it is to get these girls, especially when they have so few competing MEN to choose from since most are just salivating little boys.

Stop masturbating, buy a couple books, and GET OUT THERE and make it happen.

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First, I’m impressed the Confidence Guy reads my blog. FTW! Now, not to get caught up in particulars, but to say I think and act like a 13 year-old when I’m 14 is just factually incorrect. As for being unattractive, Mrs. Landers would tell you otherwise and she’s the wisest mom I know.

Then there is the how to get laid advice. How you shouldn’t “put pussy on a pedestal”. In the off chance Steven that you’ve seen both a penis and a vagina, you must appreciate they are not equals – hence the pedestal. Pussy and pedestal are practically synonyms. The penis should be nowhere near the vagina, which is why it’s called “getting lucky”.

Then you confuse me to no ends but telling me to buy some books and stop masturbating. Right, because nothing the drives the ladies wild like a backed-up book worm. Besides, I believe masturbating and books go hand-in-hand. If not, then what the fuck are libraries for?

Amazing the lengths I’ll go to for more Jessica Burciaga pics…

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2 responses so far

Jan 19 2009

Jessica Burciaga Naked Makes My Monday

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Jessica Burciaga, a favorite here at HGOM, is doing the March edition of Playboy. Yes, she’s butt naked and the Jessica Burciaga nude pics are everything they should be plus everything times infinite. Click here, or you are never welcome back. I mean it.

Other greatness on this super cool Monday…

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2 responses so far

Oct 10 2008

It’s Never a Bad Time to do Another Jessica Burciaga Post

Published by Brock Landers under Jessica Burciaga

Jessica Burciaga

Another month, another time, another set of amazing Jessica Burciaga pictures for all of you.  In case you guys don’t know this is my 4th time posting the lovely Burciaga and I have no qualms about posting her another 4 times in the next week.

Hell I might even consider having a Jessica Burciaga fan site.  Bottom line is that I will not stop and I mean never stop writing about this woman until her vagina is right slap damnet in my face.  That’s the only way I’ll ever rest.

Seriously though, I really think if she and I went out to dinner that I could pull it off.  I really think I could.  I just need that chance.  All guys do.

In the meantime I’m about to cry because it really hurts seeing a female this attractive.

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3 responses so far

Aug 29 2008

It’s been way too long since I’ve posted Jessica Burciaga

Published by Brock Landers under Jessica Burciaga

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Alright folks. I’m going to promise to try and keep my composure in this article. I will do the best I can to keep a clear and concise mind while writing this. As you all know Jessica Burciaga is my favorite girl to grace the social network that is Myspace. Her profile, in my opinion, is legendary. Not because it has interesting text or because she has a gazillion friends. No, it’s because of how ridiculously attractive she is. Every time I look at this specimen I like her a bit more and discover new things about her. What, might you ask, have I discovered? Well, I realized that if Jennifer Lopez and Nancy Valen (she was on Baywatch for one season and very hot in the movie Loverboy) had a baby that it would look like Jessica. Take Nancy’s lower half of the face, more skinny body and J-Lo’s upper part of the face and part of the round ass, and you’ve got yourself a winner. The rest of the magic is all Jessica and her Burciaga. What an absolute piece of dynamite.

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See what I mean about the Jennifer Lopez thing? You know Marc Anthony wishes he were hitting this, assuming he reads this website. I think making that assumption is pretty fair. Marc Anthony definitely reads this site, no question about it. Now the real question is does Jessica Burciaga read this site? Does she think I’m some pudgy little 18 year sitting at his desk dreaming of Jessie? Pun intended, yes I plugged her little website I Dream of Jessie. On the other hand, what if Jessica knew that I was a strapping 28 year old stud? 6’0, 180 lb sexy, in shape Jewish boy from Long Island who doesn’t have a Long Island accent. What would she do then? I wonder.

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Let’s play a game. How much would you pay for the opportunity to put your head exactly where you are all thinking you’d want to put your head? My estimate? 1000 bucks an hour. If I had 20 grand on me? I’d pay 1000 bucks an hour for 19 hours and then blow the last grand on a nice, celebratory dinner with the Burciaganator.

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Seriously, should it even be allowed to have girls like this walking around? As you all know she is my hands down pick but if I were to say that anyone was close to her it would have to be Erika Medina. Remember my post on her? I honestly think Erika might actually have Jessica beat in a few areas but overall? You just can’t get any better from the combo of body, face, occupation and overall zest for life that I think Jessica has. Can she please send me a thank you email already? God damnet.

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Did I mention I need to kill myself? I can’t believe I kept my composure. Not for long. I just smashed the wall.

More Pictures:

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28 responses so far

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